20 Year Reunion?!

It's official.  I've reached that 20 year post high school graduate mark.  I don't know how that's possible.  Most days I don't feel much like an adult at all.  I mean, I handle the housework and the bills but I don't really feel grown up.  It's a family trait, I think.

It's definitely not a "you're only as old as you feel" situation.  If that were the case, I'd feel beyond grown up and living in a retirement home.  I'd fit right in except I think some of them might move faster than me at times.

Remembering back, and through all the years since, I never felt like I quite fit in.  I wasn't a cheerleader, a jock, a debater, a student councilman, a class clown.  I was an average student with decent grades but sort of blended into the background.  I had a small group of friends that I'm still friends with but even they will agree, we were sort of outsiders. Don't get me wrong, I love my friends but as far as high school went, we stood out as much as the paint on the walls.

From where I stand, I still feel like that girl in school.  People have lofty careers and live away from where we went to school (but I actually want to stay here).  I'm still simple.  I've been married for nearly 16 years.  I have one daughter (wanted more but that's a story for another post) and live just five minutes from where I went to high school.

I'm strapped to this multiple sclerosis and all the BS that comes with that and so I'm a homebody with a degree I never got to use, a slew of mobility devices and the wardrobe that doesn't look like I even graduated high school yet.  Most days I don't get out of my pajamas until noon and wear my hair in pigtails.

The idea of getting together is a fun one, though.  It's not like I feel like I shouldn't go or that I won't fit it.  After all, we went to high school for four years and though we had our little groups, that's what made up the whole of us.  The class of 1993 doesn't exist completely without the sporty ones, the nerdy ones, the brainy ones, the wallflowers, the troublemakers.

We will exist as a group with our successes and failures, the great jobs, the unemployments, the thriving marriages and the failed ones, the hair losses, the weight gains, the happiness and pains that made us who we were then and what we've become.

This is who we are.  It will be fun to see it all.